Writing over The Weekend: Heart over Mind

February 24, 2013

I'm picking up my pen (or in this case, keyboard?) to write a short story after a VERY LONG time. I think it's about a decade since I last wrote one. About 45 minutes before the closing time, I got an idea, so I wrote it in a bit of a hurry.It might be a little rough around the edges since I'm WAY out of touch with story writing, so please make some allowances :D

Okay. Here goes...



Trrrriiiiinnng Trrrrrrriiiiiiinnng! Trrriiiiinnnggg Trrrriiiinngg!

"Yes yes! 94%! I know, I know, we are all proud of her! Ladoos will be doing the rounds soon!"

Trrrriiiiinnng Trrrrrrriiiiiiinnng! Trrriiiiinnnggg Trrrriiiinngg!

"94% Mama! Engineering seat confirmed thaan ippo! All my prayers have been answered."

 As I sat on the couch, celebrating with the rest of my family, I kept one ear on my mother's conversations on the phone.

The 12th Board results had come out, and as you would've guessed, I received 94%. I was ecstatic about the marks. I mean, duh! Anyone would. Never, even in my wildest dreams had I thought I'd get such high marks.

94% is a big deal in Tamil Nadu. College seats are very difficult to get with all the neck-to-neck competition. My parents were dead set on me studying engineering. Specifically, EC. They had the capitation money ready (along with a suitcase for the cause) ever since I finished writing the exams. But now, since my marks were so high, they wouldn't need to blow their money on greasing the palms of corrupt officials. That's why Mamma was so happy.

"Raaga, I'm so proud of you ma. You know that, right? Now you can study, get well settled, and who knows, you can even go to US and get a green card. You'll call all of us there no?", asked my Papa.

I laughed uneasily. "Of course, Papa. If I dont call you, then who will I call?"

It was Papa's dream get me into an engineering college. He felt that if he had studied the same, he would have a better life now. Dont ask me what's wrong with our life as it is. I think it's perfectly alright.

My elder cousin nudged me. "US, huh? Engineering? Are you sure you want to do this? What happened to following your heart?"

"Anu, shh. I'm still thinking."

Everyone wants me to go for engineering. It's the in-thing right now, and jobs right out of college are pretty much a guarantee. But I'll let you into a secret: I've never wanted to study engineering. Yes, I'm good at the subjects necessary for it, but that doesn't mean I enjoy it. It doesn't get me excited or stimulate me in any way. It's like how my sister hated Biology, but she still scored the highest in that subject. Weird, but true.

What do I want to do with my life? I want to become a Fashion Designer. But I'm scared to take the leap. If I become an engineer, my future is set. I wont have to worry about anything ever again, and neither would my parents.

on the other hand, fashion designing... It can take a lot of time to get recognised and established in the field. Plus, for the amount of money you pour in (not meager by any measure), success is not immediate. But I know that it will make me happy, and it will help me grow as a person. And if I click, that's it.

But can I do it? That's the question. My heart tells me to go for it, but my head (sensible organ that it is) is telling me to stick to the safe option.

I got up to get a drink from the kitchen. As I was sipping from my glass, my eyes fell on one of those magnet with quotes on them that are all over our fridge. "Leave the crowd, stand apart, ignore your head and follow your heart."

It was like that magnet was put right there for me, for my eyes to fall on it. It had to be Fate's way of telling me to follow my heart.

But how do I break it to my parents?

I returned to the couch.

Anu hissed from next to me, "Raaga, just go for it. If you dont open your mouth now, it'll be too late. Dont procastinate in this too. It's not wise. And I'm right here to support you,"

I stood up. Mamma put the phone down just then after yet another excited  conversation.

"Mamma, come here a minute, will you? The phone calls can wait, Ma. I have something to say."

Mamma took a seat on the arm of my father's chair. "What is it, beta?"

I took a deep breath. Alright. The moment of truth. "I dont want to do engineering."

Utter. Complete. Silence.

Yikes.

"I want to become a Fashion Designer."

That woke them right up.

"Fashion Designing aah? What?! Do you know what goes on in those colleges?"

"Where did this hair-brained idea come from suddenly?!"

"Seiously Raaga? Fashion Designer?"

I held up a hand. "Mamma, Papa, before you jump to conclusions, this did not come out of the blue. I have been thinking about this for a long time. You know I've always been inclined towards the arts."

My mother sputtered, "Yes, but..."

"I kept quiet till now beacuse I didn't want to start something just when the exams were around the corner."

Aarthi Aunty spoke up, "All that is okay, but do you know how designing colleges are? Everyone is all hi-fi. You will not fit in. Otherwise you will also change and become spoilt."

I knew this would happen and had my argument ready. "Aunty, my parents have given me a wholesome upbringing and have instilled strong values in me. I will not go astray. You will just have to trust me on this."

My father still had not said a word. "Papa, waht do you think?"

He looked up at me; he looked dazed. I hated that I put that look in his eyes. "I dont know what to say. All this time, we were all planning so much, and suddenly... I had dreamed so much for you..."

I went to my father and placed my hand in his. "Pa, I know you have big dreams for me, and I love you and thank you for it. But just because I'm not going to be an engineer, doesn't mean that I still cant fulfill those dreams, Pa. I swear you dont have to worry about me. I knew all the worries and questions that you would have, so I've researched it well. I even have a mail typed out and ready to send to you with all the proof." I grinned.

That brought a small smile to his face.

"And you just wait and see Daddy. US is what you want for us, right? Just you wait. I will go not only to US, but I will travel all over the world. You and Mamma will never have anything to worry about. I promise, Papa."

I could see the spark coming into Papa's eyes again. "Promise?"

I knew what he meant. I grinned. It was our little ritual.

I jumped onto his lap (I may be 18 and an adult in the eyes of the world, but I'll always fit into my father's lap) and sqeezed him as hard as I could. "One, two, eight or eighteen, a promise I make I will keep."

I stayed in the circle of his warmth for another moment.

My mind was clear. My world was right again. My heart was right after all.

"Thank you, Papa."


This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

*Update on 1/03/2013*: I'm super excited that this thingie got the badge! Yay! :D


4 comments :

  1. "Leave the crowd, stand apart, ignore your head and follow your heart." So true.
    I loved the last son-papa conversation. Kudos!!!

    Silly Smiles... Take you Miles :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. good one...follow your heart! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. aww thank you Surbhi and Akila! :D... and yes, that's my favourite part too!

    ReplyDelete
  4. With ma n pa's support...taking on the world seems so much easier! :)

    ReplyDelete

Leave a comment and say hi! Anything else is great too! :D

This blog is an award free blog. I'm truly honoured that you would think to nominate me, but unfortunately, things are really hectic for me what with juggling college, books, and blogging, and I find myself unable to spread the awards to other deserving bloggers.